Roller Derby will let you leap over tall buildings in a single bound, shoot fire from your eyes and give you the ability to read minds! Just kidding, but it will do some pretty amazing things for you.

You thought I was kidding about the leaping part?? Thrashley, former CRG All Star. (Photo courtesy of Sean Hale/Hale Yeah Photography)

It will make you want to push yourself harder than you ever have before and do things that you never thought you were capable of. Another added bonus? Derby gives you a great butt. Seriously!

If you’ve ever seen a roller derby bout then you already know how physical the sport is. In order to keep up you’ve got to practice, practice and practice some more. I promise you at some point in all that practicing (and eventually playing) you will realize it changed you. You might skate so hard you want to puke.. but you don’t and instead you keep pushing on. You might jump through the air like a nimble gazelle (see above). You might block a really good skater so well that they give you a high five afterwards! Seriously, we do that in derby. We’re a weird bunch.

Did I mention that sometimes we meet famous people?!

Which brings me to another great side effect of playing this sport- the instant network of skaters that will become your teammates, and quite often, your friends. Derby is everywhere- there are hundreds of derby leagues from all over the world, so if you travel or move you’ve got an instant connection almost anywhere you go.

It’s going to take a lot of work. It will take up a lot of your time. It will give you confidence, an instant derby network AND a great butt! If you’re still reading and want to give this crazy derby thing a go, keep reading.

Yes, really. We mean you!

Read the requirements and what we test on here and if you think you’d like to do this but need to get your feet under you first there are details on open practices you can join for a small fee. There are a lot of people that play derby that had no previous skating experience, so don’t be deterred if you aren’t a pro on skates yet!

If you think you are ready for tryouts then join us at Jellybeans in Wakefield  Saturday August 31st from 8-10 a.m. and show us what you’ve got!

Does all this sound like fun but you really don’t want to skate? We are always in need (and forever grateful to) Non Skating Officials (NSO’s) and our volunteers. They are the ones that keep score, keep track of penalties and help with all the other important things that go into running our league. No experience necessary!

If you would like more information please email us at

Contributed by Lil Rosie Rotten

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